Chapter ten: Dear Mr. President, your no hero for the common people

Its amazing how far weve come as a society. We have gone from living in huts and living off of berries and small animals, to living in buildings made of steele that reach up thousands of feet into the air. Weve gone from nudists who had to eat things raw to being flashy fashionistas who fly about in airplanes bigger than they need to be. Weve gone from being a world that is ruled by white land owning men that depend on the labor of enslaved africans to being a society where anyone over the age of 18 can have a say in how the country is run. Weve gone from knights fighting over religious control in jerusalem to being corporate leaders fighting over economic domination and stocks. Weve come far as people but some things never change. Still in this country we are overly abundant in ignorance. We still go around quoting a book that was written thousands of years ago and translated so many times its no longer the same. We go around dictating and jusging people based on words in this book, where it also says , that man is not fit to judge another man and thusly is the biggest sinner of all when they do so. Yet still we live in a society where someone is demeaned , harrassed, abused , bullied , murdered, and treated as second class citizens simply because they are attracted to members of the same sex. My faith in humanity is severly low. As a gay guy in highschool in north carolina , i can tell you first hand that , things havent changed. Everyday i get called the word faggot, the most demeaning term in the english language, by people who dont even know me, and are afraid to say it to my face. In my second period class last semester and my third period this semester im forced to be in an enviroment with some of the most ignorant closed minded hypocritical people it has ever been my displeasure to meet. I hear them in the back of class mumbling slurs like faggot under their breath directed at me. I feel the erasers and crayon peices and trash and other various projectiles that they throw at me slap the back of my neck with the burn of the hatred that was invocked upon throwing it. I dont understand how people that dont know me or anything about me, people who i dont say anything to or in any way try to infuriate would want to intentionally cause me pain simply because im gay as if my sexual orientation had the slightest bit of signifigance to their lives. Im forced to be in class with these people, and its not all the people in the class, i dont disturb class i dont bother anyone i mind my own business and do my own work. Yet day after day i have to endure being humiliated and harrassed. Im not one to swallow my pride, in fact ive had a history of violence. During my middle school years i was in and out of the principles office, my peak was three times in one week. I had a lot of fights, i never started any of them but i always got suspended. I was teased and humiliated for not only being short , but gay. And i was particularly hesitant to come out of the closet because of the bullying i experienced in my middle school years. One particular fight that is still talked about amongst members of my senior class is my fight with a kid named aaron who had called me faggot and shoved me into a desk. I lost all of my cool at that moment and leaped upon his back and put him in a tight choke hold, I was going to kill him literally and truely. Luckily before he was to the point of passing out my teacher walked in and we were both hauled into the principals office where i once again was suspended. Ive come a long way since then i have learned a lot of self control since then and since 8th grade have not gotten into a fight at school. Like i said its hard for me to walk away and let things go especially malicious things like this , things like this are the cause for events like columbine. Today was the worst day, its only six or so days into the new semester, and ive been harrassed up to my boiling point. In fact today i thought i was going to go to jail for murder because i did not think my self control was going to last. I sat minding my business and continually was bombarded with things thrown at my back while im just trying to take my test. At one point i turned around and shouted to the corner of the room from whence the things were coming and shouted very loudly. " Whoever is throwing shit at me over there, the next thing that hits me is the last straw im going to take the broom in the corner over there and knock you out with it knock it the fuck off!" as soon as i turned around another thing hit me in the neck. My hands tightened as i squeezed my pencil and heard it snap in my grasp. Unfortunately for me im in a precarious position, the administration staff does not look out for us gay students ( the whole three of us). If i get harrassed it goes unnoticed if i complain all ive done is give the harrassers a reason to escalate the situation into violence, but if i fight back im going to get suspended. If i get suspended it goes on my record and no college will accept me because of it. I have spent three years enduring hell and dealt with it well, i have bit my tongue so many times it practically has holes in it. And if i didnt need latin 2 to graduate i would drop the class. After the bell rang i went to lunch to vent to my good friends, and after lunc ws over i got in class first and had a conversation with my teacher who said he'd talk to them and tell them to knock it off. The final bell rang and clss was back in session once again the back of my head was a bullseye. I nearly lost my cool when the bell finally rang and i could go home and smoke a cigarette to calm me down. Im to the breaking point with being harrassed and not quite sure i can take any more of it. Its a shame that so much has changed and yet gay people are still harassed and treated as if we were slaves. Its a subservient society we live in and we are far from where we should be, some of the most talented influential people in history were part of the minority that still today is denied the right to marry and its legally permissable to treat us like we have no civil rights at all, school especially is a battleground everyday i myself worry about wether or not one of the homophobic people i go to school with is going to commit an act of violence against me that i wont see coming and get away with it. I have to fear for my life because the media and the parents and american society in general has taught generation after generation to fear and hate and debase gay people, they are taught its okay even "the right thing to do" they are taught to hate. why is it this way and why is it that i no longer feel safe to walk around. It shouldnt be like that for anyone living in america, especially now that everyone else has their rights in full, Its now worht a three day suspension to say the word " nigger" but yet i get called a faggot at least four times a day and noone seems to bat an eyelash. Its a fucked up world we live in